Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
