Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
