check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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