from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
