That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
