STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
In other news, I just burned my penis
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
