You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
