The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
