sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
