love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize