two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
