wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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