whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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