I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize