I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
