there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
