we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
