I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
