It's like God shit irony all over that family
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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