i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
