look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
