is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
