we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
