For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
