They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
