well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
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