it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
