i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
