It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize