Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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