I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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