overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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