Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
