oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
