my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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