It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
