There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
only you would photoshop your dick
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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