Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
