why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
