If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
