yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
