So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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