it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Randomize
