you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
