Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Barsexuality is the new black.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
