You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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