Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
