I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
