it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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