so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
farters have to be the big spoon...
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
He passed out mid-signature
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
